Worry

Team J is running on a skeleton crew this week. I'm going to Atlanta for a conference tomorrow morning, and a couple hours before I fly back on Saturday, ZPJ flies out for Oregon and won't return until next Thursday.

PROS:

• There will always be someone here, so we didn't need to get a cat-sitter
• It's too hot to cuddle much anyway

CONS:

• Everything else

Things have been a little crazy at Team J headquarters this month. We were just barely dealing with the loss of our Casey Cat, and then a couple weeks ago Benny started going downhill. I tried to be moderate and measured, but I barely made it a week before hauling her skinny little black butt to the vet and bursting into tears in front of the doctor. Several hundred dollars later, the tests have shown that EITHER Benny has some intestinal inflamed bowel thing, or she has lymphoma in her intestines. The treatment for both is steroids, so she's getting juiced for a couple weeks and if she gets better it's the bowel thing, and if she doesn't get better...she doesn't get better. Last night she was really looking good, hunting down dangling deli slices and cuddling all night. Tonight, however, she's huddled in the dark and refuses to eat anything or let us hold her. I am FREAKING OUT about leaving town and then being alone with her all next week, but what can you do.

I used to be a normal person, but I've become a crazy cat lady who obsessively talks about her cat's health and eating habits. Sorry.

Retreating

I just realized exactly how long it has been since I've blogged, but I'm on a staff retreat in the woods and can't really do anything about it except say:

"HI!!! I hope your July is rocking and rolling!!!"""

Bolster

Well, it turns out I don't completely suck at my job!

Just found out this evening that we were successful in our first fully-competitive local government grant. Yay government funding!

It's been a long year of denials and brush-offs and I'm feeling very good about knowing that some of my hard work is paying off. And within the next couple weeks we should hear about discretionary funding and one private grant that I've been gunning for, so even more to look forward to.

I like writing, I like problem solving, I like thinking creatively about how to make things grow, but I'm not crazy about constant rejection. So am I cut out for Development? Of course, who IS crazy about rejection? Is this a field only suitable for masochists? Anyway, it was nice to have a day that DIDN'T include getting shot down. Yay!

Part-Timer

This is the first week of the summer where I really feel like I am working part-time, even though I've been nominally working part-time since, well, since I moved to New York three years ago, I guess. There have been phases, especially during the summer, when that seems like an accurate description of my schedule, but most of the time it just feels like what it is - that I have four part-time jobs. This summer I'm down to two, though, and it looks like I'll actually get to reap the benefits.

However, there seems to be a inversely proportional relationship between my schedule and ZPJ's. The less I'm working, the longer hours he has to spend at the office. He's been rolling home at about 10:30pm and working all weekend the last couple weeks, and it looks like its going to stay that way for awhile.

So, basically, I have all this free time to myself. What will I be doing with it?

Here are some ideas, but please give me some of yours as well:

• Using my membership card to its fullest extent and becoming a daily regular at The Brooklyn Botanical Garden
• Being one of those smug, freelancing hipsters at the Tea Lounge on Union Streeet sipping cappuccinos and typing furiously on their laptops (although I don't have a mac, so there is a limit to which this is achievable)
• Spending at least one afternoon a week down on the beach at Coney Island
• Writing a novel
• Writing a play
• Kicking my creative life up a notch - getting some work done on all those projects which have been gathering dust
• Going to museums (especially on days when I need the air conditioning)
• Learning to love cooking
• Visiting family members who are near but not in the metro area

What I will probably spend all my time doing (if history teaches us anything):

• Watching marathons of "What Not To Wear" and eating grilled cheese sandwiches in my pjs
• Having very long and in depth conversations with my cat
• Spending an unreasonable amount of time shopping online for things I don't need
• Complaining about the heat
• Wishing more of my friends also worked part-time
• Bombarding ZPJ with fevered monologues when he gets home at night because he's the only person (besides the cat) that I've talked to all day

Can I buck the trend? I hope so. This could be a beautiful summer if only I would just put some underwear on and leave the apartment.