Mixed Metaphors

I have always said that I cannot afford to cultivate my palate when it comes to wine. Beer? Sure. Cheese? Mostly. But good wine is expensive, and I'd rather enjoy with what I can afford. Better to be ignorant and happy than aware and disappointed.

If only I applied this maxim to my professional and educational life.

I have been blessed in the last few years to be working in challenging and rewarding environments, taking classes from talented and brilliant people, and having classmates and colleagues who push me to better my own practice and understanding. As a result, I have fairly high standards for professional excellence. I strive to reach those standards myself, and I am bolstered by the examples of the people I work with. This should be a good thing, right?

But then I find myself in a situation that is by no means bad, but by most means mediocre, and I become intensely disappointed. I become a Complainy Jane.

The training that I went through last weekend was very frustrating experience. I think the model that was being implemented is a useful and informative tool, but I was so exasperated by the way it was facilitated that I chewed through all the pens I used over the weekend. For one thing, there were seven facilitators. Yikes. Too many cooks in the kitchen. Well, no, they were all cooks and that was fine. But too many waiters serving what they cooked. Hmm...how far can I take this metaphor...several of the waiters were friendly and polite and genuinely pleased to see us enjoying the meal they had brought us. Others, however, hovered over the table, shooing the other waiters away, watching us eat, telling us what we tasted and what to think about each dish, defensively explaining why things were the way they were when we had a question about one of the ingredients, and suggesting how we might write our review of the meal. I was so distracted and upset by the way that we were being talked to that I couldn't focus on what they were serving.

Okay, I'm leaving the metaphor. I resent being lectured to about student-centered education when I am a student and have no way to participate in the discussion. I resent being told that reflection and questioning is essential for learning and then not being given the time to reflect. I resent having my opinions solicited and then having them filtered and restated by someone who is hearing what they want to hear. I resent posing a rhetorical question to a large group of my peers and being given the "right" answer by the facilitator. I resent having complex and subtle pedagogical issues boiled down simple tip-lists and then have it suggested that if I don't accept the tip-list it might be because I'm not smart enough to understand the issue.

It turns out that a good training model is not bad-facilitator proof (don't worry, ida, none of the transgressors are from your camp. Your camp was a delight). I did learn a lot this weekend about being a teaching artist and facilitator, but most of what I learned was from remembering what its like to be on the other side of the podium and how frustrating it is when one or two people's voices overtake an entire discussion.

See? I'm a Complainy Jane! I have had too much high-quality instruction and now I find problems and faults in everyone else. But unlike wine, I don't think that good learning environments are a luxury. I think it should be the base standard. So, am I snobby and elitist? Am I unable to be pleased? Maybe. I really did try to take responsibility for my learning and push through the bad communication styles to have a real discussion. But you, dear readers, get to hear about my frustrations.