Tug-Boat, Schumg-Boat

This weekend ZPJ and I were walking along the waterfront and I pointed to a large ship with three, huge sails and said "Look! It's an old-timey schooner!" ZPJ looked out, then turned to me and said in a condescending tone "That's a tug-boat."

This irritated me greatly because he immediately assumed that I was too ignorant to know the difference between a schooner and a tug-boat, rather than considering that he was looking at the wrong boat. So I yelled at him.

You say "tug-boat," I say "so's your face."